All around me, Daisies were happily hammering their woodworking project with a parent sitting next to them, guiding them. My Daisy, Megan, and my son, Alex, who has to come along for our Daisy meetings, sat with their materials in front of them, waiting for me to take charge and tell them how we get started. We were at our bi-monthly Daisy meeting and our troop was fully embracing this building activity. As a co-leader, I was not having a good night. I forgot we were supposed to bring a hammer. Or maybe I shoved it back into my subconscious, dreading this moment.
I have poor spatial skills. I have no experience with hammering and building. I HATE projects like this. I felt paralyzed. I didn't know how to even begin, so I didn't. I moved a few things around the table, but that was just to look busy. If I could have left for the bathroom, or a drink of water, or a trip to the nurse, I would have GLADLY. Ah. Suddenly I see. I see how it just sucks to sit somewhere and be expected to do something you have no clue how to do, don't really want to do, are sure you are incapable of doing. I see how some of my students must feel at school each day, when reading and writing tasks feel to them like woodworking felt to me. Which is to say DREADFUL. At Daisies tonight, a caring dad saved the day. He had already helped his daughter, and he must have seen us sitting there, doing nothing. My children wanted to make this project and so he came in and kindly helped them to do the hammering and assembling. Sometimes, we all need a little help. Sometimes we need a lot. Tonight was a good reminder of how awful it is to feel like you are incapable of doing something that everyone else seems to know how to do. How a helpful person can make the difference. Why escape and avoidance are such sensible ways for students to deal with the pain and anxiety of feeling lost in the classroom. How a teacher can recognize when students are avoiding and escaping and find ways to make learning endeavors less stressful. While it felt really awful to feel so inadequate and clueless, it did provide this insight so I hope some good can come from me being so terrible at my Daisy meeting.
7 Comments
11/5/2019 04:01:06 am
I could just imagine you sitting there forlorn and agitated and with the expectant looks of your children. I'm grateful the father came to help you. A good lesson for us all.
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11/5/2019 04:04:22 am
It's not possible for me to love this post more. I'm sorry it was a tough night, but I'm so happy that you took this experience and will use it to help your students. YOU! Kathleen, YOU are such an amazing educator!!! I am always inspired by you!!!
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I think it’s good for all of us to find ourselves in situations like this. It is humbling, but it allows us to empathize with kids so much more. When things like this happen, it is a reminder that we can talk to kids about working through hard things as adults so they can understand that we see their struggle and want to help them — just as that dad did for you.
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11/5/2019 04:55:30 pm
You offer such great perspective on what our students feel. I loved these painful words: "I see how some of my students must feel at school each day, when reading and writing tasks feel to them like woodworking felt to me. " I wonder what approach that Dad might have used to get you to try hammering? These are the contortions we teachers have to do.
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11/5/2019 05:03:24 pm
Thank you sharing your experience and helping us all see through the eyes of our students for a moment. It is an important perspective to keep in mind.
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11/5/2019 05:34:28 pm
A worthwhile experience. Something we all need to remind ourselves. It is so hard to do hard things and we all often find ways to avoid them. Who wouldn't! Love that you shared this moment with us today.
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AuthorKathleen Neagle Sokolowski Archives
February 2024
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