#SOL20 Day 18 Regrets and Redo

On the last day I saw my students, the weather was raining, gray, gusty. and matched my mood.
A birthday weekend for my daughter was approaching with tons to do to make it happen. Yet all the news was the Corona Virus getting worse and closings were likely. Would the parties go on? 
I was thinking of all the report cards I still had to get done sometime between now and the following week. 
I was thinking of an argument I had at home that morning, an upsetting start to my day. 
I was snappish with my students.
I was less understanding at times.
I felt on edge.
I felt unsure of what would be. 
I didn't think we would be closed for weeks, maybe more.
I didn't think that might be my last day in the classroom with them for quite some time, possibly ever. 
If I had known we were saying goodbye for an extended period, I would have spent more time sowing seeds of love and hope, of encouraging them to keep learning, to keep connected. 
I wish I could do it over.